NEWS » for a long time. -- David and Katie Finale, Carl

Got a question on rule clarification, comments on rule enforcements or some memorable NHL stories? Kerry wants to answer your emails at cmonref@tsn.ca! Hey Kerry, I have a question on a video I watched not too long ago and thought maybe you can give some clarification and or give us some stories like always. So the video I saw was NYR vs BOS, during a timeout CNBC had a mic near NYR bench. Obviously Torts was unhappy (as always) and you can see him yelling at an official. However during the video you can clearly hear the official tell Torts "thats enough" then proceeded to swear at the coach. My question is, are the officials allowed to swear at the coaches? I was always under the impression that referees were supposed to be held at a higher standard than every other person on the ice. Seems odd that a ref would go as far as swearing at a coach who is already clearly heated in that type of situation. I understand the fact that everyone has their boiling points, and this official was getting tired of hearing Torts yelling at him. However isnt is the refs job to try and defuse situations rather than add fuel to the fire? Thanks again, love the articles Kory C ------ Kerry, There is a video circulating of a linesman yelling "Eff you" at John Tortorella. Judging by public image of the Rangers coach, he probably deserved it. On several occasions, you can read lips of the officials and phrases like "shut the eff up" seem to be pretty common. Im sure some guys do it more than others but Im wondering how common and accepted it really is for officials to swear at players and coaches? Thank you, Eugene Kory and Eugene, It is inappropriate for a referee or linesman to curse at a coach or player at any time! In the heat of the battle (and as emotions escalate), it is imperative that officials fight the human instinct to engage their perceived adversary. Instead, their objective should always be to defuse the situation by becoming part of the solution instead of part of the problem! The best way to do that is for the official to remain in control of his own emotions. That being said, have I ever slipped up and cursed at a player or coach? Absolutely! After all, there are times when we just cant fight off our human instincts. I must say, I learned very early in my career that to defuse hostile situations, I needed to remain as emotionally neutral as humanly possible. I also recognized that to be successful, I needed to develop positive relationships with players and coaches through appropriate forms of communication. From a state of calm, I attempted to exert control by creating a "win-win" situation wherever possible. I recognized that every player and coach had distinct and unique personalities and it was my job to figure out what worked best in dealing with them. Body language and tone of voice are two elements that need to be kept in check as an official enters a debate/confrontation. The first time I came to understand there was a better way in dealing with an out-of-control coach was when Bryan Murray was behind the Washington Capitals bench in the early 1980s. Bryan is an emotional guy and, at the time, led the league in bench penalties for his theatrics in protest of the officials decisions. During one game in the Cap Center, the coach was standing up on the dasher boards screaming wildly and waving his arms at me. I decided to try a different approach, since bench penalties didnt seem to be altering Bryans unacceptable behavior pattern. I approached Murray with both of my hands up in front of me with palms open (a sign of peace as opposed to a finger point) and my monotone voice only loud enough so that I could be heard as opposed to screaming back at the out-of-control coach. I took control of the situation by stating to the coach that I would like to talk with him but in order for me to do so, he must calm down and to please get off the dasher boards. Bryan immediately complied to my polite request as his emotional pitch conformed more toward the one that I had presented to him. At this point, I started the conversation by saying, "You might not agree with what I have to tell you but let me explain the reason for my decision on the play." I quickly and calmly communicated with the coach what I saw on the play. Murray listened intently and then paused for a brief moment as he chose his words to respond. Bryan said, "Well youre right about one thing, Kerry, I dont agree with what you just said but thanks for coming over and explaining it to me!" In Bryans post-game interviews, he said the dialogue that he and I had was the first time that a referee ever approached him at the bench to provide an explanation and he really appreciated it. That incident taught me a huge lesson in relationship building. I also found that it was important for me to think of what I was going to say and actually hear myself before opening my mouth. When my emotions would start to rise and my voice got louder, I would take a breath in an attempt to return to centre or neutral. I can recall stopping in mid-sentence during a heated debate with a player and saying, "Im sorry I just said that; let me rephrase, what I meant to say was..." I learned the hard way it was much better to adopt the philosophy as a referee to "treat disrespect with respect" than to engage in or attempt to win an "Eff you" contest. I attempted to set acceptable and achievable limits for game participants similar to those I set for myself. Lastly, I tried not to take myself too seriously and to find humor in situations wherever possible. I learned that valuable quality early in my career as well when a team was getting their butts kicked at home and became extremely frustrated; especially with me. My response at the time, to their disrespect, was to assess misconduct penalties and as the score mounted near the end of the game, I had four players from the home team in the penalty box with 10s! The coach had enough of me as well and wanted to get thrown out of the game. He sent his captain over to me at the stoppage who very politely relayed a message for me. The captain said, "My coach wants to know if he can get a penalty for thinking?" Somewhat confused by the question, I responded by saying, "I guess not as long as he doesnt think out loud!" The captain then said, "In that case, he wanted me to tell you he thinks youre an Effing A#$%^&*!" I started to laugh, finding the humor in the statement. The coach, who was waiting for a battle response from me that never came, started to grin and then laugh as well. The game ended without further incident and a positive relationship blossomed with the coach. Sometimes you just have to find the humor in the situation, Torts! Nmd Xr4 Norge . - Goaltender Philippe Desrosiers of the Rimouski Oceanic has broken a shutout record that was only three months old in the Quebec Major Junior Hockey League. Ultra Boost Norge . Klitschkos management company says the bout will be the Ukrainian fighters 25th world championship fight. The 1.83-meter (6-foot) Leapai defeated the previously unbeaten Denis Boytsov in November to become the WBOs mandatory challenger. http://www.nmdnorgesalg.com/ . -- Patrick Reed got an early start in golf. Nmds Norge . The No. 1-ranked Nadal tweaked his back warming up for the Australian Open final, which he lost almost four weeks ago in a major upset against Stanislas Wawrinka. His first stop after the layoff is the clay in Rio as he tests the back and tries to stay healthy for the French Open in three months. Nmd Sko Udsalg . JOHNS, N. After 12 tumultuous years in the Bronx, Alex Emmanuel Rodriguez played his final game in pinstripes on Friday, having helped slug the New York Yankees to one World Series title -- and helped whiff them out of eight other Octobers.Along the way, A-Rod won two American League MVP Awards and was handed a historic 211-game ban from baseball for his role in the Biogenesis performance-enhancing drug scandal. In an appeals process that ultimately reduced his suspension to 162 games -- the entirety of the 2014 season -- his battle with Major League Baseball and the Yankees turned bitter.Since then, he has worked to repair the damage with his team -- which now employs him as a special adviser after serving him with his unconditional release -- and with his teams fans, who seem to root for and revile him in equal measure.With one final chance to say goodbye, ESPN.com spoke to fans on the night of A-Rods Yankee Stadium farewell. Their words painted a picture of a love-hate relationship between the tainted but talented slugger and those who followed him, both on and off the field.I came here tonight because Ive been an Alex Rodriguez fan since 1997, and I could not miss his final major league baseball game. -- Nicole Baade, SeattleA-Rod, hes just another player that will soon be forgotten. I think in a few years, hell be forgotten. Wont even be talked about. -- Junior Pagan, New YorkA lot of the hate he gets he brought upon himself, but as a fan, I root for players that face adversity. -- Louis DiLullo, Providence, Rhode IslandThe way hes retiring is just ... its sad because the guy had such a great career, and so many MVPs, and so many playoff appearances, I dont understand. Bringing in a new era is good, but you only have a little bit left of the season to finish out. -- Anthony Criscione, New YorkI was never really an A-Rod fan, to be honest. Hes been with the team for 12 years, hes given us one championship for $300 million -- I figured hed do a little bit more ... without all the drama. -- Brian Schaeffer, New YorkHes still a Yankee. A-Rod is A-Rod, Theres only one like him, whether they say its because of steroids, whatever the case may be, he still did his thing for the Bronx and the Yankees. I support him no matter what. Hes a Bronx Bomber. -- Bee, New YorkI mean, handss down, hes one of our favorite players, and its crazy that hes retiring tonight.dddddddddddd -- Aidan Sheehan, also pictured Liam Sheehan, Middletown, New JerseyI hope he retires! He cant come back -- everybody would hate him if he came back. He needs to be done. Hes made enough money. -- Nicole Santilli, OrlandoI think its really, like, for a Yankee fan, its a typical love-hate relationship. He catapulted the Yankees into winning the World Series, and also hes been a Yankee for [12] years. How do you not accept what hes been to us? -- David Rodriguez, New YorkI think A-Rods great, I have nothing against the man; I think hes been unfairly singled out. I think hes fantastic. -- James Jimmy Cunniff, New YorkIts very heartbreaking seeing him retire now. I felt like hes still got more left in him. It almost feels like hes being forced to retire, but Im one of his No. 1 fans and its just really tough to see. -- Joel Carrasco, New YorkHonestly, his last game is something that Ive looked forward to for a long time. -- David and Katie Finale, Carlstadt, New JerseyI feel like he shouldve played third baseman tonight. His last game ever, youre really not gonna let him play the field? It hurts, it hurts. -- Brian Anderson, New YorkIm an A-Rod fan because hes part of the Yankees. But as an individual, I think hes a talented player, but Im not an A-Rod fan, per se. Since hes gotten to the Yankees, the one ring in 2009 -- I had higher hopes for him. -- Alexis Pacheo, also pictured Daniel Pacheo and Felix Torres, New YorkHe has, over the last two years, grown on me. And my guess is hell end up in the Marlins organization at one point as a coach or part-owner or whatever, I kind of see him down there. -- Ellen Katz, Greenburgh, New YorkI dont know any Yankee fan whos ever come in here, over 16 years old, who said A-Rod was their favorite player. -- Michael Rendino, New YorkYou get a lot of hate for being an A-Rod fan, I think, from just the last few years. But when youre a true A-Rod fan, you stick with him. -- Jordan Baade, Wahoo, NebraskaIm very old-fashioned. I liked when Babe Ruth was doing everything on hot dogs and beer. -- Jason Polito, New York ' ' '